


All Fun and Games

by roseverdict



Category: Kirby - All Media Types, Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, because I just did, except it's not the skelebros it's the, idk uhhh, it's the puffbuds, meet the skelebros!, you ever just lose all self control
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-21 23:05:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16586006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseverdict/pseuds/roseverdict
Summary: In which the fallen child encounters creatures of the round and squishy variety, Kirby's appetite transcends all timelines, and Bandana Dee is both very tired and very exciteable. (or, more accurately: in which kirby and bandana dee take the places of sans and papyrus and rosie's chill is still missing.)





	All Fun and Games

**Author's Note:**

> I saw Kirby Undertale on tumblr and you know I had to do it to ya. http://roseverdict.tumblr.com/post/179880648515/octosummer-fumu-han-doodles-fumu

You let the great doors close behind you. Time to start trudging through the snow.

There's a large branch laying in your way. You step over it and continue on-

A high-pitched whistle pierces the air.

You glance behind you.

The branch is gone.

Unnerved, you turn back to the unexplored forest. There's something in the distance you can't quite make out, and you quicken your pace.

You hear footsteps, as if a person shorter than yourself was crunching through the snow. They abruptly cut off.

When you whirl around to check, the path behind you is empty.

With your heartbeat pounding in your ears, you speed up even more, turning your curious walk into an uneasy jog. A gate of some sort looms ahead, so hopefully that means civilization isn't far off.

Just as you're about to step through, an unfamiliar voice stops you.

"Hi there!"

You freeze up, the blood rushing in your ears suddenly the only other thing you can hear. Whoever it is, they've snuck up on you with barely any warning. Your mind is hung up on the sound of their footfalls-or rather, the complete lack of sound.

"Aw, don'tcha know how to greet a new friend?"

Their voice is cheery, but you don't trust like that. Someone who can avoid making noise in the snow is someone with unparalleled powers of stealth. The fact that they let you hear them at all is both a blessing and a curse.

"Turn around and shake my hand!"

You swallow.

You turn around.

With a shaking arm, you take the offered hand in your own.

Except this person doesn't seem to have an actual hand. Their arm simply ends in a smooth nub.

Your eyebrows knit together as you try to covertly feel more of this person's "hand." Your analysis comes to these conclusions: the "hand" is soft (in the squishy way), soft (in the velvety way), and warm. It almost feels as if its owner had just been holding a nice bowl of freshly-cooked pasta.

…why your mind came up with such a specific metaphor, you'll never know.

The person doesn't seem to care about your investigation: they're too busy enthusiastically shaking your hand.

"Hiii! Don't worry about weirding me out because you're holding my hand weird! People do it a lot, probably because they're used to others having actual hands!"

You swallow again, this time to stave off a somewhat-hysterical chuckle.

The person catches themself in their tangent, and you take a moment to really take in what your eyes are telling you.

There is a pink puffball in a blue hoodie and slip-on slippers standing in front of you. Because the people in the ruins weren't weird enough.

They smile again _(do they ever stop???)_ and ask, "So, you're a human, right?"

You nod. It's not like you can react any other way.

"That's really cool!" They exclaim. They chuckle again, as if at some inside joke, then add, "I'm Kirby! Kirby of the Stars!"

You smile and give Kirby a little wave of greeting.

"I'm actually supposed to be keeping an eye out for humans right now, but…" Kirby sighs, then continues, "…I dunno, I just don't like the idea of capturing somebody because of something they can't help being, y'know?"

Maybe you're reading too much into that last sentence, but Kirby sounds almost…melancholy?

"My best buddy, Bandana Dee, though," Kirby suddenly sounds completely chipper again, "would probably love to capture a human."

Understandable. You get the impression that capturing a human is a really big deal around here, and you're willing to give the benefit of the doubt as to why. You'd like to think they just want humans for something they can't get a substitute for but desperately need, not that they just get their kicks from hunting innocent people down.

Hopefully.

"Oh! I think that's them coming right now!" Kirby glances at something behind you, then back at you. "Come on! They didn't really make the bars of this thing close enough to stop anybody, anyway."

Well, it's not like you can really say _no_ to this…uh…kid? Grown-up? Ageless person with insane stealth skills?

You and Kirby walk through the gate, and after a few more steps, Kirby points off to the side. "Quick! Go hide behind that conveniently-placed fridge!"

Well, that fridge is definitely placed in a convenient enough spot.

You try not to think about it too much as you hurry out of view.

You hear Kirby's voice, though no longer directed at you. "Hi, Bandana! How's it going?"

A new voice, one you can only assume is Bandana, answers. "Come on, Kirby! You know how it's going! It's been over a week and you still haven't put your puzzles back together after that last training exercise! What have you even been doing?!"

Kirby shifts in the snow. "I've been working on getting a fridge out here. Have a look, B.D.!"

_Kirby said **what.**_

Thankfully, Bandana Dee sounds just as frustrated. "Kirbyyy, you know we're not supposed to bring snacks out here! What if a human raids the fridge when nobody's looking?! We have to be on our toes!"

You sense a dramatic speech coming on, and you peek around the side of the fridge to get a look at what exactly is happening over there.

An orange puffball is facing away from you, a spear in their "hand" (does nobody around here have fingers?!) and a blue bandana on their head. They stomp one foot on the ground, with their spear clenched in their…uh. In their nubbly. "I will be the one! I must be the one! I will-I will capture a human! Then the king will reward me, and maybe even learn my name!"

Okay, this Bandana Dee person definitely knows what they want. You have to respect that.

"I'll be respected…recognized for my bravery!" Bandana assumes a confident pose, their spear standing tall. "I'll finally be able to join the royal guard! People will ask, to, be my, 'friend?'"

Your heart skips a beat. No wonder they're so dead-set on capturing a human. You have to restrain yourself so you don't blow your cover and hug them right then and there.

"I won't be looked down on because I'm 'just a waddle dee' anymore!" Bandana finishes. You can just _hear_ the sparkles in their eyes.

You suspend your disbelief a little more.

Kirby puts a nubbly to their mouth in thought, then asks, "You sure you don't want a snack?"

At this point, you figure Kirby's not actually trying to out you, so you're free to enjoy the irony when Bandana groans. "Kirby! Why is it always food with you? You don't take action anymore! Every day, you just stand around, doing nothing!"

Kirby shrugs, completely prepared for Bandana's outburst. "Hey, now hold on, I've gotten lots of stuff done today!"

There's a pause, and then, with the cheekiest grin you've ever seen, Kirby adds, "Lots of _foodstuffs,_ anyway!"

You can't help but snort at the terrible pun, so you thank your lucky stars when a rimshot plays out of nowhere, drowning out your voice.

"KIRBY!"

"Hey, I'm not seeing a frown!" Kirby points out with a wink.

Bandana's free nubbly goes to their face-a face which you note has a distinct lack of a mouth at all, frowning or otherwise. "Well, you're not wrong."

Their eyes are crinkled up like they would be smiling if they could, but you decide not to bring it up once they go.

You watch Bandana's posture slump, at least as much as a short orange ball can slump. "Why does it take so much to get recognition around here…"

Kirby's mouth twitches up at the edges. Oh boy. You prepare yourself for another pun.

"Gee, Bandana, it sounds like you…"

Your hands fly to your mouth in preparation.

"… _speark_ from experience!"

The rimshot from nowhere echoes in again, covering up your stifled laughter. Oh, gosh, that's horrible and you love it!

Kirby shrugs, the biggest, most smart-aleck-y grin spreading across their face as Bandana tosses their arms up in defeat. "I give up, that's it! I'm gonna go work on my puzzles! And Kirby…"

Is Bandana Dee going to…?

" _Appe-try_ a bit harder, alright?" Bandana's eyes crinkle up some more.

**INSTANT RESPECT.**

Bandana laughs as they head out of the clearing, a… _unique_ sound, to say the least. "Keheheheheheheheh!"

They turn around before disappearing from view, offering a final "Heh!" before leaving.

Kirby waits a moment longer, then turns to the fridge. "Alright, the coast is clear!"

You step out from behind the fridge, then glance to your choices in direction. Back to the ruins? Or forward to the unknown and Bandana Dee?

Kirby sees your indecision and pipes up. "You should probably get going. Dee might come back, and if they do…" Kirby giggles. "You'll have to sit through more of my amazing jokes."

You're half-tempted to tell Kirby how ineffective the 'threat' is.

You turn and head the same direction as Bandana went, but Kirby's voice stops you. "Actually, hang on. I hate to bother you, but…could you do me a favor, please?"

You look back with an eyebrow raised. Your silent question speaks volumes.

"Well, I was thinking, B.D.'s been feeling blue for a while now." Kirby explains. "They haven't actually ever seen a human before, so seeing you might just make their day."

You bite your lip nervously. On one hand, your heart goes out to Bandana. On the other hand, attempting to cheer them up would likely result in yourself getting captured, or worse.

Kirby seems to already know your worries. "Don't freak out about it. They may be amazing with a spear, but they're too nice to actually try to hurt anyone…no matter who they are."

Well, you managed to get out of the ruins mostly unscathed. You can make it through this, too.

You nod.

Kirby beams. "Oh, thank you thank you thank you! I'll see you up ahead, then!"

You watch as Kirby starts walking.

Towards the ruins.

At this point, you've already suspended your disbelief high enough to reach the stars. Sure! Kirby can work around the laws of reality! _You've already seen magic and kind monsters and terrifying flowers! **Why not throw in some good old-fashioned misdirection while you're at it?!**_

You close your eyes and take a deep breath.

When you look again, Kirby is gone. There's a twinkling sound at the edge of your hearing, but it fades as you listen to it, so you shrug it off and start trudging through the snow.

**Author's Note:**

> On one hand, I have more ideas for this. On the other hand, I really don't wanna burn out on this like I have on…literally every other fic idea before it. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


End file.
